Dark Dreams
by Narya's Bane
Summary: In the time of Dark Empire, Mara Jade hears a voice that is familiar yet that of a stranger and must choose her path.


Dark Dreams

by Narya's Bane (aka K. Lee Brown)

Summary: at the time of Dark Empire, Luke had already met Mara Jade: The Emporer's Hand. Which begs the question why, if Luke knew where she was, why didn't Palpatine return to recruit her as well? Maybe, just maybe, the answer is- he did.

Disclaimer: if I owned it, I wouldn't be writing it here.

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It is a distinct fact the Jedi don't dream... or even daydream. Mara Jade, on the other hand, had never been able to figure out if this applied to her since she was not in fact truly a Jedi. She had never considered herself anything of the sort, had never even thought about the fact that the noun could be directed towards her. When she was the Emporer's Hand she had been able to dismiss the thought of being a Jedi completely; after his demise, when she had lost something of the Force, she had known it certainly did not apply to her; now, after working with Luke Skywalker and rediscovering the part of herself that reveled in drawing on the energy around her, she was no longer so certain. HE was a Jedi, and would probably ask her to join if he thought she would even consider it...

Not that she **would** ever consider it.

Karrde had point blank asked if she wanted to continue on with him, or leave to work with Skywalker. The answer had been all too simple: Skywalker was a whining farm boy, and she was not. She had been adamant that her place was here, part of this merry band of smugglers. She never looked back.

The red-gold of her hair shimmered slightly in the lights of her quarters. With a sigh, Mara set to brushing it out. It wasn't often she had a moment just to work with it, but it tended to hang wild and she was willing to use that time she did get. As she brushed out her hair, she took to simply counting to occupy her mind and keep it from straying too far. When her mind strayed, it tended to take a long time in returning- which caused a great deal of discomfort. It was weak, and she abhorred any hint of weakness. Added to that, for the past year it seemed it strayed onto thoughts of a particular farm boy who was out to save the galaxy- but only, she assured herself, because of her annoyance with him.

She certainly didn't care for him, and these days she-- mostly-- didn't want to kill him.

It was best to concentrate on what was happening, on where and who she was...

_Mara Jade._

It was not her own thought, not her own voice, that reminded her of her name. Abruptly, Mara set down the brush and sat up straight. THe voice, the presence, was startlingly familiar though she somehow had trouble placing it. She knew it was in the Force, and knew it was powerful. It was unlike most touches she had known in her career...

_Mara Jade, Emporer's Hand._ It was a presence she hadn't felt before. At least, it wasn't the same as she had felt it before...

_I have found her, Master._

Mara reached out in the Force, hoping to pinpoint a location to see if she was in immediate danger. Almost instantly she understood that the speaker was far away, not about to attack her- which is why her Danger Sense hadn't gone off. Still, there was something disconcerting about this contact. Like a long lost memory of hatred and dread. **Hatred. Dread. ** Suddenly, Mara had a disturbing realization that what she had felt was akin to the touch of a Force practitioner who had barely concealed his dislike of her: Darth Vader. But Vader was dead, was gone...

_ Skywalker? _ Mara somehow dimly hoped she was wrong.

_Hello, Mara._ The voice was disturbingly cold, but unmistakably reminiscent of the Farm Boy she had trekked around with on Wayland. Mara shifted uncomfortably, unsure what was happening. Perhaps, she considered, it was best to ask the question directly.

_ Do you have a purpose in contacting me this way? _

_Your Master has wondered why he could not find you. I was able to locate you for him._

Mara had suddenly become confused, but knew enough to hide it- even bury it in the Force. _ I have no Master now _she chided.

_- You have always served me well, My Hand. -_

The second presence was one Mara was intimitely familiar with. She felt Skywalker pull away, leaving her conversation private. Excitement filled every part of her being, and her nerves stood on end. _ This isn't possible _ she sent through the Force, unable to control the thought's transmission.

_- It is possible through the Power of the Dark Side, My Hand. -_

Mara knew her mind was reeling. Surely this was some masterful trick of the Force. She had FELT the Emporer die, had been subjected to the sheer power he sent through their bond with his last command. Yet there was no way to fake his presence in the Force; only through their bond could he hope to communicate with her across the stars. And yet... _ Why were you unable to find me without the help of Skywalker? _she asked, troubled.

_- I am an old man, My Hand, and needed assistance in locating our bond. Skywalker knows you of late, and was able to determine your location quite quickly. -_

That did not feel like the entire story, but Mara found she did not care. _ So the Farm Boy is now one of your subjects. _

_- The Son of Skywalker had taken his father's place at my side. -_ Hidden in the Emporer's clarification was a rebuke, but Mara cared little. Vader had had little use for her, and she had no reason to respect his son... which reminded her...

_ Son of Skywalker. You could have mentioned, by the way. _

_- It was not knowledge you needed in your posession at the time. And you did discover it on your own. - _It was a hint of satisfaction that took Mara off guard. He was pleased that she had discovered this secret before he revealed it to her, had found out when it was of significance.

_- I need you, My Hand. -_

Mara hesitated. _ You have Skywalker. _ She let her impatience, her disappointment and jealousy, slide through the bond to come to Palpatine's foremost thought. _ What use do you have for me? _

_- I always have need of loyal subjects, My Hand. -_

_ I failed you. _Mara concentrated, and the old frustration and fear came up. Her misery, her sadness- all the guilt at having betrayed her "Master."

_- And that is why it is Skywalker now at my side. -_

Mara took a deep breath and felt a subtle nudge from the Force. "Don't overplan this," she reminded herself. With The Emporer, those who had plans could get them pried from their brains. Then, finally, she was willing to speak. _ I know Skywalker. He is not at your side. _

_- You see treachery, My Hand? From Skywalker. -_

_ I don't need to see it. _Mara nearly hesitated, then sent forward the truth. _ He is a Jedi Master. He will not join with you. _

_- Then he will sow treachery, and I will take you as my apprentice. -_

That was the summary of all Mara had wanted as the Emporer's Hand long ago. She had studied just enough of the Force to sense danger, and hear her Master's call, but had always wished for more. Basic control was not enough- she had wanted a place at his side. As his apprentice, she would have had the Emporer's full attention, and been able to sense all things around him. It was the desire she had hid from everyone, the fear Vader once had that Mara could understand. It was what Mara had wanted...

Once.

That was before she had sensed the treachery of the Emporer himself, before she realized how he had used her over and over again to create an Empire that was impure. He had LIKED the in-fighting, the corruption, and had probably revelled in teaching Mara just enough of the Force to become tainted without truly being of the Dark Side. Mara had come to fear what the Dark Side stood for, now that she truly understood what It was. She had seen its evil, felt its pollution, and knew she wanted nothing of it. It was the Dark Side that had fueled her quest for vengeance for too many years- vengeance which she knew she did not truly want.

_ I'm sorry, I'm not interested. _

_- Not interested? NOT INTERESTED? -_

_ Leave me be. You are not my Master anymore. _

It took every bit of concentration she had, but Mara caught it up and threw the presence out of her mind. It wailed, and did its best to taunt her as it dissipated from her. Somehow, Mara was certain she had just gotten on a list of people the Emporer was going to be tracking down. Karrde would have to be warned, and she would have to take some precautions for her own safety.

She took a deep breath. If the Emporer was back, she was going to have to take a stand. Somewhere along the way she had admitted to herself that he was not a good person, had never wanted what was best for the galaxy...

_Mara?_

That was Skywalker again.

_ What are you playing at, Skywalker? _ she asked. _ Don't tell me you've fallen to the Dark Side, because I don't buy it. _

_I had to find out those things my father knew._

Mara sighed. That was just like her Farm Boy, too. And if he happened to save the galaxy in the meantime...

_ You get yourself in trouble, don't you dare comm me. _

_Don't worry. I wouldn't think of it._

Then Luke broke the connection off carefully, and Mara was again alone in her quarters. She picked up the brush and went back to combing her hair, but couldn't concentrate on the counting. Instead, a strange thought worked its way into her head... how was it that Luke had been able to maintain that contact with her? They shared no bond- that she was sure of. Was it the Dark Side powers he was tampering with? His proximity to the Emporer? The thought, however dissipated- filed away for later contemplation, if she wanted to deal with the Farm Boy then.

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It would be many years before she realized the answer, because it would be many years before it was possible again.


End file.
